Thursday, January 14, 2010

10.000 Miles Above

No one knows the way my eyes burn for you.
With the sight of an angel
too bright for these pupils
it's red, white,
can't see past you.
My mask
tattooed on my face
smile when I think of you
but the ink seeps through these pores
infects my brain
can't handle the nightmares
when the ugliness takes over
you're not with me
God damn you should be;
maybe it's my fault for loving you
from the follicles of your hair
to the edge of your toes,
I never loved another
quite this way,
if I could physically
rip out my heart
for you,
would that change your mind?
Or leave me lifeless
with a stagnant pulse,
I feel nothing
and everything
I walk in circles because I fear change
and I grasp this familiarity
like a line in a song
I repeat in my head
surrounded by words
I refuse to let in,
I write to release
because it's harder to look in your eyes
and say these things to you,
with words on paper I can hide behind the dark ink
so that you can't see my weaknesses
can't wipe my tears,
your touch makes this harder.
I want to live in a dream with you,
it's me against the world,
my world is you.
Conflicted
and these waves keep crashing
wash me up at shore,
you know me better than I do
my independence
held hostage
by an addiction to your attention
I crave you unknowingly,
set sail on your ship,
the one I thought would take me home
instead led me to you,
aching for your drug
I'm an addict for this high,
Hi, my name is _______.
forgot myself in the midst
of this misery,
how could something that gave me so much happiness
give me so much pain?
The answer lost
in the tears I cried
over you,
wear them on my face
sleeves dripping
like a prize
I was given
for allowing this addiction to overcome
me.


~bk.35~






Currently listening to:
Between the Bars by Elliott Smith

Monday, December 21, 2009

Simple

I'm not looking for love,
I've been down that road before
Found no destination.
I've fallen into something that doesn't exist
and the emptiness follows me like a ghost,
like a shadow,
to remind me of all the things I've lost along the way.

Honestly, I find it easy to avoid thinking about you.
It's simple.
If simple means impossible,
then impossible is nothing.

Fingerprints draw broken hearts in the dust that settles on your picture,
torn apart by your urge to find something better out there,
legs chopped off the pedestal I once placed you on
loneliness rages inside me
attempts to singe the remains that have settled in the cracks of my heart.

And to think that love can trump all things,
that's what you said to me, at least.
You saw our hearts dancing eternally to a melody of poetry and a never-ending symphony of laughter and honesty, it would be beautiful music that whets the tongues of critics and observers alike, a marriage of happiness and love.

The record skips.
and suddenly the song is over.

I deserve to fall,
I deserve to feel,
I deserve to know what it's like
to hold onto love like I know I can.
The force that renders us may be strong,
but please let me show you that I can be strong for you, too.


~bk.35~






Currently listening to:
Un-thinkable (I'm Ready) by Alicia Keys

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Lost in Love

Before I was graced with the sound of your voice,
I listened to words, yet never truly heard them.
You spoke to me with the sweetest of tones,
swept me off my feet with the breath that trailed each previous word.
Shadowed by the magnificence of your mannerisms which grasped me with this endless sense of beauty that pulled me in deeper and refused to let go.
I lost my sense of all direction;
That maybe there was the slightest possibility I had this same effect on you,
the power to give myself to you,
to surrender myself to you,
to make you realize the magnitude of my love for you,
and the fact that for you, I would have done anything.
Love is patient,
and as each minute passed, I found myself falling deeper and deeper,
forever is not just a word, it's a promise,
my promise to you that I would have waited for you as long as you needed.
The way your eyes and smile coincided when you were overcome with happiness,
the way you smiled when you kissed me was a perfect occurrence that captured me and proved to me that I could have kissed those beautiful lips for the rest of my life.


~bk.35~







Currently listening to:
Little Bit by Lykke Li ft. Drake

Friday, October 2, 2009

Dark Horse

[[12 days...be home soon.]]



I'm drawn to your irregularities
and the fact that I can't read your feelings
This loss of control is no disaster
my heart beats faster.
I can't shake this attraction
my emotions explode with insatiable passion,
your name is the sweetest melody
the song that sweeps me off my feet
trickles chills down my spine,
I tremble.
Crushed.
Burrowed in the abysmal distance
that renders us,
digging for any notion that this love still exists
the sand drips through your fingers
and you pocket the debris.
In one stroke,
I could paint you the sky.
It wouldn't be a masterpiece
but it would be eternal
like the flame in my heart
that rages stronger with time
the flame that burns only for you.


~bk.35~






Currently listening to:
Where I Stood by Missy Higgins

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

you like me

You said that what we have
it's young love,
and if that's what it is,
I don't want to grow older.
And I know it will hurt
but I'm willing to deal with the pain,
just as long as you are in my arms
at the end of the day.
You say you love my smile
It's like this mouth was made for you.
And I know you aren't hungry for some corny lines
So to you I speak from the heart.
I want to send you a letter every time you cross my mind
...want to fill your mailbox with junk that only makes sense to us
green beans and skunks
overflow your inbox
make sure you don't forget I'm here.
Your voice fills my ears
when I wake up you're all I see
like a flashlight in a dark room you arrest my vision.
And like sight I can't grab you when I want to
but your picture will be my saving grace.
I like you too, you said.
I hold onto those words
just to survive.

~bk.35~






Currently listening to:
Yellow by Coldplay

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Copy and Paste

I'm stuck in the place between YOU and I
but I don't know if it's LOVE.
I'm stuck in the moment between
goodnight and each breath I take
waiting for you to kiss me.
The place where it feels like time stops
with each blink,
a shooting star shoots past us,
we don't notice.
I count your eyelashes
'cause our eyes are intertwined
Our fingers are too, dancing beneath us
but neither dare look down.
It's that burning in the back of my knees,
that pounding in my chest,
the throbbing in my stomach;
the words that I can't say because they wouldn't be enough.
If only I could copy this moment
and paste it to your forehead.
when you look in the mirror
your first thought is this;
this happiness, this bliss.
I wish I could kiss you with my thoughts
'cause sometimes my lips are tired
but my ideas are endless.
Like every fantasy I've ever had about love
comes true when I see you.
And when I close my eyes I want to take you with me,
on a journey through my imagination,
so you could know what it feels like
to be surrounded by your atmosphere.
And you could feel my heart beat faster.
I don't know if I'm still making sense,
but the beauty of love is that it's so unclear,
and it gets messy but that's why I'm here,
to clean things up when everything falls apart.
I don't know if it was love at first sight
'cause I'm not even sure if I know what that means
I just know that the sound of your voice
brings me back to the moment when I first laid eyes on you.
And all I wanted to do was be near you,
in your presence,
and listen to you speak,
with every inch of beauty inside you
pouring out when you said my name.
Intoxicated by your breath,
I find myself submerged in the absence of time.
I want to breathe you in,
If your love is a lesson,
you have my full attention.

So here we are.
stuck in the same place as before,
the place where I'm waiting for you to kiss me,
these words I can't accumulate
'cause when I'm with you,
I'm speechless.
I close my eyes
and you pull me closer to you,
fill the voids in my soul,
you enlighten me spiritually with your lips
and your touch numbs me.

With you, I am free.

~bk.35~





Currently listening to:
Simple as It Should Be by Tristan Prettyman

a distant memory

I would fight for you
like it's battle for one last breath.
When I see your face
I feel what I felt the first time I saw you,
and I want to deny it but it's impossible
'cause when you said forever
I believed you
and I still do.
Let me in again
not the way I was before,
This time I want to KNOW you.
When I look into your eyes,
stare deep into you,
I want to see myself in the depths of your soul,
in the back of your head,
I'm the only one on your mind...
I hold on to an idea,
but at night I'm alone,
your arms would be my only resting place,
I want to suffocate in your embrace.

~bk.35~






Currently listening to:
Black Balloon by Goo Goo Dolls